Causes of Misbehavior 

According to Rudolf Dreikurs, a trained physician and psychiatrist, there a four main causes or “mistaken goals” of misbehavior.  They are attention, power, revenge, and the display of inadequacy.  Dreikurs, along with many other modern educators, believe the true reason for children to misbehave is because they just “want to belong!!”

Mistaken Belief Adult’s Feelings/
Response		 Child’s 
Response		 Mistaken
Goal		 Corrective Measures
I belong only when I have constant attention. Annoyed. Desire to remind or coax.   
Blows up.
Whines.
Gets angry at
partner/other children.		 Child stops temporarily when given attention. Child often does not care if it is negative or positive attention. Attention Ignore the behavior.
Redirect the behavior.
Logical consequences.
Give choices.
Do the unexpected.
Encourage.
Use humor.

Example:  A child continuously yells “MOM” when the mother is on the telephone. 

Adapted from Nelson, J. (1987). Positive discipline.  Ballentine Books: Fair Oaks, CA.

 

I belong only when I in power or winning or am not allowing you to win.             

 

Provoked, threatened,challenged: “I’ll make you do it!”
Gives up.
Finishes tasks.

Intensifies misbehavior passive or aggressive defiance.                         

 

 Power

Withdraw from power struggle. 
Wait for cooling-off period. 
Win child over for problem solving. Decide what you will do. 
Encourage.
Model task.

 

Example:  A child refuses to clean up his or her toys. 

Adapted from Nelson, J. (1987). Positive discipline.  Ballentine Books: Fair Oaks, CA.

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